Princess joins StarClan
by Rochy214
Summary: Says it in the title
1. Chapter 1

There was darkness. It surrounded her, she felt like if she as drowning in inky blackness. Then, a single figure appeared. He had a orange pelt like fire, and bright, green eyes. Then he looked at her. He disappeared. Then, the place lit up. The she-cat stood up. She felt as peace here, it was really nice. The place was a stretch of green grass with a full moon. Thousands of stars were illuminating the place. Then, another figure appeared. She was blue-gray, with blue eyes. When she looked at her, the she-cat felt like if she was an old friend. The she-cat was a tabby and white cat. When the other cat looked at her, she let out a gasp of surprise."Who are you? My name is Bluestar, former leader of ThunderClan. What are you doing in StarClan?

"Hi, Bluestar, my name is Princess. I do not know where I am. Can you help me go back to my housefolk?" asked Princess.

Bluestar gave her a confused look. "You do not know?"

"Know what?"asked Princess, nervous.

Bluestar gave her a sad look. "Cats go to StarClan when they die. If you are a kittypet, how are you here?"

"Wait, StarClan? Firestar told me about that. It seemed nice that cats look over other cats" she replied.

Bluestar sighed. "That must be why you are here. Come with me, Princess."

As she spoke, she walked forward towards the stars. Princess followed.

Then, a waterfall came into view. "We will go through the waterfall."

Said Bluestar.

As they came through, Princess let out a gasp. There, a sunny day

Put into view a beautiful land, with green grass and smooth rocks ideal for sunning. There were four big trees, each in bloom with different flowers, one pink, one purple, one yellow, and one with orange flowers. There, thousand of cats were sharing tounges, eating, or sleeping.

Bluestar and Princess were on a cloud, watching from above. Then, she spotted Firestar. He was sleeping, with a cat next to him, licking his fur. She was a ginger cat with green eyes.

But Princess was quivering with excitement. She can be with Firestar! As she prepared to leap, Bluestar landed on her, stopping her from doing so.

"Why did you jump on me?" She asked when Bluestar got off of her.

"You may be dead, but you can still get hurt." Hissed Bluestar.

"Okay." But she jumped off anyway. She was heading for Firestar, eager to greet him. She landed on him, and he let out a hiss. He turned on his back, squashing Princess. When she loosened her hold on him, he turned back to his paws, sending her flying. When she landed, he was about to jump on her and bite her neck when he finally saw her.

"Princess, what are you doing here?" He asked her. Sandstorm, next to him, was bristling with shock.

"I am not entirely sure, but Bluestar told me I'm dead."By now many cats were surrounding them. Lionheart, how was laughing at Firestar, managed to stop laughing long enough to ask him who she was. Before he could answer him, Princess piped up and said,"Hello, my name is Princess and I am Firestar's sister! I'm also Cloudtail's mother" she said, with a hint of pride.

"Yes, but why, how are you here?" Asked Lionheart.

"I am not sure, but I think I'm dead. I think I already established that."

"Yes, but how? You are a kittypet. How do you know of StarClan?"

"Firestar told me."

"Well, now that you're here, I might as well show you around" mewed Firestar. Beckoning her with his tail, he walked off to the great big trees. Entering the orange one, the landscape changed before them. Now, there entered a vast forest. They walked for a few moments. They stopped to see a cat stalking a mouse. The cat was a dark-gray she cat, with blue eyes. As she pounced, Firestar called a greeting, and she raised her tail in greeting. Walking to her, he said,"Hey Cinderpelt! How are you?"

"Great!" She responded, and left to share tounges with the other cats. As they walked, Princess asked him a question.

"Is Cloudtail here?" She asked him.

"No" he responded. "Do you want to see him?"

"Can I? That would be great!"

"Okay." As he talked, he walked over to a puddle, and the reflection before him changed. Instead of himself, the reflection changed to a a white, fluffy cat, sitting next to a white and ginger cat, with a scratched eye, and one ear reduced to shreds. But Princess' attention was all on the white cat. She let out a squeal, and jumped through the puddle. Firestar jumped after her.

Meanwhile, Cloudtail was lying down next to Brightheart. He was enjoying her company, when Princess came out of nowhere and jumped him like she did with Firestar ealier. Before he could react, Firestar came out of nowhere and pulled her off of him. Then Firestar looked at Cloudtail, said hi, then jumped back into the puddle. Then Cloudtail jumped in after them.

When they emerged, Cloudtail found Firestar on Princess, stopping her from jumping back into the puddle. Then he fainted.

Meanwhile, Brightheart was totally confused.


	2. Chapter 2

Brightheart blinked. She could not believe it. She saw Firestar tackle a tabby and white cat that jumped Cloudatail, and then he said hi to him. Then he jumped into a puddle with Cloudtail following him. She had to tell someone. Screaming "Bramblestar!" she ran into the leader's den where Bramblestar was sleeping. Then he started sleep-mewing.

"I don't care I'm going to do it. It's just a branch on a tree, Tawnypaw. It's not like I'm going to die." Getting an idea, she made a high pitched voice then started to talk to him.

"But if you do die, what is going to happen to me? You still owe me a squrriel!" Then she started to wimper.

"I already gave you that squrriel. Besides, if I don't do this, I won't be brave enough to be a warrior." After he said this he started to get up and walk to a tree, climbed it, then he hold on to it for dear life. Knowing that Firestar once save Bramblestar when he was a kit, she climbed the tree and bit Bramblestar scuff, she almost fell down because he was heavy. Then she said,"Fireheart, what are you doing?" Then she dropped him. When he fell, he looked wildly around screaming," Who dropped me? I am a Clan leader! I deserve respect!" Then he ran into the camp, wanting revenge.

Meawhile in StarClan, Firestar was dragging Cloudtail's body to the puddle. Princess was fussing about how great and strong he looks. After a while, Firestar emerged from the puddle, dragging the fluffy warrior's body. Then came Bramblestar. "You let me fall, I respected you, and you let me fall!" Mad, he tackled Firestar into the puddle.

Then, Cloudtail woke up, screamed 'I saw it, I saw it, then fainted again.


	3. Chapter 3

Lepoardstar was staring at a puddle in a forest. She was seeing Firestar and Bramblestar fight, and she found it very amusing. Then they came out, squishing her. With a hiss she sprang at them, breaking them apart.

"How dare you disrespect me like that!" Bramblestar was still pissed off that Firestar let him fall according to him.

"Disrespect? Me? You tackled your former leader for StarClan's sake! Besides, I didn't let you fall! And you used my transporting puddle!" With that, he lunged at him and they started fighting again. After a few moments Firestar eventually won."Don't ever use my puddle again! It's the only way I can spy on you guys!"

"Why would you need to spy on us?" asked Bramblestar

"Who knows what the Clan will do without me?" Then he spotted Lepoardstar. She was looking at them with pure anger in her eyes. With one swift glance at Bramblestar they both shouted " RUN!" and took off to the puddle with Lepoardstar closely behind them.

Poor Brightheart. First her mate got jumped, then he disappeared into a random puddle, then Bramblestar almost made her fall off a tree, and her mate reappeared, only to shout something and faint. Then Lepoardstar, chasing Firestar and Bramblestar, came out of the puddle.

"I'll flay you into mouse-strips!" She howled, then tackled Firestar. Bramblestar joined her into trying to kill him. Then came Tallstar.

"Hey Firestar, you still owe me ten mice when the Clan didn't panick when you died!" After he spotted them, he quickly tackled Lepoardstar and the two started fighting. Without Lepoardstar, Firestar qiuckly beat Bramblestar. At that point Cloudtail was awake and was watching the whole thing, laughing his tail off.

"ShadowClan better not come." Brightheart mumbled under her breath. Lucky for her, ShadowClan will come next chapter. But that didn't stop other cats from coming. Yellowfang came out, and was tackled by Tallstar and Lepoardstar. Letting out a hiss, she tackled them into the puddle.

"That is it!" Outraged, Firestar made sure every cat that came put of that puddle went back. After that, he lapped up all of the puddle. Only then when he finished he realized that the puddle was his only known way to got to StarClan. "Mouse-brain!" he scolded himself. Then he looked around him. ThunderClan was staring at him back.

"F-Firestar?" Squrrielflight was staring at him, her green eyes wide open. Then, she ran over to him, happy to see her father again. With delight, he licked her ears, telling her how proud he was of her. Then he made an annoucement.

"I will go to the moonpool now, Squrrielflight will come with me." Then they left on their journey.

Meanwhile, in Starclan, Yellowfang, Tallstar, Lepoardstar, Bramblestar, and Cloudtail (somehow) were staring at the place where the puddle used to be. Princess was staring at them before noticing Cloustail.

"Cloudtail!" she squealed before tackling him again, purring loudly."Oh Cloudtail, look at you! I was so worried when I heard you left! I thought I was never going to see you again! Oh by the way I'm dead." Cloudtail didn't react, then seemed to notice his mom.

"Princess!" With a lick he greeted her, then they started talking. Meanwhile the leaders were talking about how they were going to bing Firestar back and Bramblestar back into the real world.

"We could find another puddle" suggested Tallstar

"But what if we accidentally go back in time or something?" said Lepoardstar. "Frankly, I don't care if Firestar never came back. He was really annoying." Then she left.

"But how will I return to Brightheart? I need to know how she is!" Cloudtail broke in. He looked frantic now.

"Who's Brightheart?" asked Princess, suddenly suspicious.

"My mate." Cloudtail did not know how she would react now. "She was the white and ginger cat you met when I visited you. She had kits some time ago."

"You have kits? That's amazing!" Then she went back to pestering him for details.

"We could try finding a puddle in one of the other tree territories" suggested Tallstar. Then, he leaped into a great big tree back into the place were thousands of cats were sharing tounges. Entering the pink one, they emerged to a place of many streams. Cats were there, fishing. Finding a puddle, he walked over to it and went inside of it, followed by Cloudtail and Bramblestar.

At the moonpool, Squrrielflight and Firetar entered, ready to lap up some of the water when Bramblestar, Tallstar, Cloudtail, and Princess came. Firestar and Squrrielflight fled as soon as they saw them emerge. They ran all the way back to the camp, screaming. All of the Clan rejoiced when they came back. Then Firestar started panicking.

"I want a patrol to attack Moonpool." Half of the Clan went. "The rest of you can go attack WindClan because Tallstar scared me." The other half went to WindClan. Then he collasped when Bramblestar, Cloudtail, Princess, and Tallstar went into camp, panting. Princess at once went to his side, worried. Cloudtail went to attack WindClan since that's were Brightheart went. Then, the half that went to the moonpool came back.

"No one is there" panted Jayfeather.

"Wait, why did you go? You're blind!" screeched Firestar.

"You told us to go!" Mad that he mentioned his blindness, Jayfeather lunged at him, but went completely the wrong way, he had landed on Tallstar. While the two fought, Lionblaze came, with scratches.

"We need backup! We need more cat if we are going to beat WindClan." At once, the half that went to attack moonpool went to attack WindClan. At the mention of his former Clan, Tallstar went with them. Firestar was at the lead. When they arrived, they found WindClan defeated by ThunderClan. Tallstar freaked out.

"How dare you lose! We supposed to be strong. I need to talk to Onestar now!" While he talked, Princess went over to Firestar.

"If all of your Clan is here, who is defending the camp?"

" Oh catmint I completely forgot! ThunderClan, screw Tallstar and come with me!"

Then he went to ThunderClan camp, only to find Blackstar.

You know how I said ShadowClan was going to come next chapter? Well, screw that.

"Blackstar, what are you doing in my camp?" Firestar screeched like a kit.

"You were a kittypet, right?"asked Blackstar

"Yes why?"

"I need your help. I found a strange device and I wanted to know how it worked."

"Ok!"

Blackstar lead Firestar and ThunderClan to a flat screen device. Firestr let out a squeal.

"It's the new IPhone 7! I thought I was never going to see it come out!" He quickly turned it on. Then he put on a song.

Hey, hey

You you

I don't like your girlfriend!

"OMG I LOVE THIS SONG!" yelled Blackfoot. Everyone stared at him. They expected Firestar to say that. Afraid that Blackstar was going to sing, Firestar quickly took off the song and went on youtube to catch up on his fav. youtubers. He put on Mama tads' Blackstar is too white and nerdy( search it up it is a real video). Everyone started laughing. Especially Cloutail. Blackstar looked embarrassed. "SHUT UP CLOUDTAIL! Your now much better off. He put on Cloudtail joins ThunderClan. Now it was Cloudtail's turn to be embarrassed. Princess was laughing her head off.

They spent the rest of their lives watching Mama tad videos.


	4. Chapter 4

**My friend wanted this ending, and since she is wanted it, she will get it. ( also, she will probably annoy me until I make this chapter and review** **her** **other** **story so yea.)**

You know how I said that they spent the rest of their lives watching youtube? Well, I made a slight miscalculation. They spent the rest of the phone's battery life (a.k.a a few hours.). During those hours, this happens.

As they listened to the song, Blackstar took the phone from whoever had it, and started to sing along.

"NOOOO!" Firestar cried as he started to sing. Blackstar started to jump on cats as he sang.

"THIS IS WORSE THAT JUSTIN BIEBER WHEN HE SANG BABY!" Cloudtail screeched. "THAT STUPID TWOLEG STARTED TO PUT THAT SONG ALL THE TIME I WAS THERE!" Then, Blackstar jumped from Firestar to Cloudtail, squishing them both.

"WHYYYY!?" cried Bramblestar when Blackstar jumped on him.

"YOU RUINED THAT SONG 4 ME!" Squrrielflight yelled when Blackstar started to sing, and jumped on her.

Now, Sandstorm is supposed to be here, but I can't remember if she was there or not, so I have to make a reasonable reason for her to be here. So I will make her fall out of the sky from StarClan. Let's say she fell off a cloud.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Sandstorm yelled as she fell. SPLAT!

"NO! SANDSTORM! WHY?" Firestar yelled. Okay, I admit that that was not the best idea. So let's make something brake her fall this time, okay? Okay. Rewind

One rewind later.

"AHHHHHHH!" Sandstorm yelled as she fell off a cloud. Then, Both Blackstar and Sandstorm went SPLAT! As Sandstorm landed on Blackstar.

"NOOOOOO! SANDSTORM! WHYYYYYY?" Firestar yelled. * looks at me * "QUIT MAKING HER DIE!" He yelled at me.

"Your lucky that I haven't made you die!"I yelled back. "I could put you in a bridal dress made for cats right now!" Wait, I should. Ehh, maybe later. Oh well. Rewind

Rewind.

"AAHHHHHHHH!" Sandstorm yelled as she fell from the sky. Then, she landed on Cloudtail. But his fluffy pelt saved both of them. As she landed, Blackstar had a heart attack because, well, a cat fell from a sky. What did you expect?

Anyway, he ended up dying because I don't feel like writing about him anymore.

Back to the story, Sandstorm was busy licking her fur cuz it was really ruffled. As she did this, her and Firestar decided to walk through the forest. As she started to run, she tripped over something rectangular. It was dark brown, and had a picture of a kitten about two moons old. He had a flame colored pelt, and dark green eyes. He had a collar that said Rusty.

"EW MY STARCLAN!" Sandstorm yelled. "Firestar, this kitten looks just like you!" As she opened the thing, more photos of the cat were there. One was of Fir- I mean Rusty- in a little tuxedo for kittens. "EW MY STARCLAN! You look extremely cute in this, this, this thing!" Firestar 's fur prickled with embarrassment.

"I remember that. They called it a 'tuxedo '. It was really uncomfortable."

"And this one shows you in a weird thing!" As Firestar leaned in to see, Sandstorm grabbed the thing and made a run for it.

"Sandstorm, get back here with the thing!"

"Nuh- uh! I'm going to show everyone this thing with little puddle reflections of you!" (A.k.a photos.) But since she was carrying the thing in her mouth, it was muffled.

"Huh? What?" He yelled after her. Then, he found cats huddled around the thing, laughing.

"Hey Firestar, you look like a kittypet!" Longtail sneered.

"You are supposed to be blind! And I was a kittypet at the time!" Firestar yelled back. Longtail went of crying because he hurt his feelings.

"Hey Firestar, why is your fur green in this reflection?" Berrynose asked. Firestar leaned in to see what he was talking about, a picture with Rusty, his eyes closed and his mouth opened like if he was crying. On him was green paint (what bad owners) and he had a green bow on.

"They dumped a green water thing on me, I was green for a whole moon." He shivered at the memory.

"Hey, whose that?" Someone asked Firestar. A picture had him and a little tabby and white kit on him. Rusty's eyes were closed, revealing small white teeth.

"That's Princess, my sister." He answered. Cloudtail was looking at the picture with saddness in his eyes.

"What kind of name is Princess?" some cat asked.

"Better than yours!" he snapped. Then, he froze as a picture revealed a picture of him, in his old garden. He was on a little barbie car, and he looked scared.

"EW MY STARCLAN!" Sandstorm telled once more. "You are in a small monster!"

"And you looked really scared!" Longtail sneered.

"Longtail, you are blind!" Firestar screeched, upset that Longtail is seeing again.

Then they all died of Cloudtail's fluffyness cuz I'm too depressed to continue this chapter cuz I slept a lot today.

Noooooooo Donaldtrumpstar must not win!


	5. Chapter 5

Tigerstar and Firestar stood on the Great rock in Four trees. The four Clans stood under the rock. "Together, we will take out all of the kittypets and make the Clans great again!" Tigerstar howled. "We will build a wall to make sure they stay out! Choose me as leader of all the Clans!" Lots of cats howled their agreement.

"Don't listen to Tigerstar!" Firestar yelled. "I can insure you that if I am leader, I will make sure everyone is satisfied! We cannot let Tigerstar win! The Clans will be stronger together!" Cats howled agreement. "For those who elect me, for those who don't, I will be the leader for you!"

Let me tell you what is going on.

Every ten years or so, all four Clans gather to survive the harshest leaf-bare. So, each Clan leader competes to lead the four Clans. Tallstar was eliminated first because he was too fragile. Blackstar was eliminated cuz he sucked at speeches. Firestar is wanting to the the first cat that has kittypet blood to be a AllClan leader.

"We cannot give such a blood thirsty cat the title of AllClan leader! He will destroy us all! If he becomes leader, I can guarantee you it will be the end of us! I have experience as leader, and ask my Clan, I am a good one." ThunderClan yowled agreement. Vote me, and we will survive! We will be stronger together!"

Vote for Tigerstar or Firestar in reviews plz! Thx!

Fun facts 'bout me: I thought Yellowfang was yellow until I saw the cover of Yellowfang's Secret.


	6. Chapter 6

Everyone stared at the cat coming down from the sky. It was a she-cat with black, white, and purple fur. She had beautiful, chocolate brown eyes. As she descended, she fell face first onto the ground. She got up and shook her fur.

"You saw nothing!" She spat at everyone. Everyone started to laugh at her. "I WILL COOK UP ALL OF YOU, THROW YOU INTO THE RIVER, MAKE YOU PUT UP WITH LONGTAIL FOR MORE THAN TWO MINUTES, AND LET BEAVERS EAT YOU!" Everyone looked at her with sheer horror in their eyes, quiet. "That's much better!" She purred. "I have the total of four votes that people voted." She paused as everyone cheered. "DID YOU JUST FORGET WHAT I TOLD YOU? I WANT ALL YALL YOU SHUT THE FREAK UP!" Everyone shuted up. "Before I tell you who voted, I will introduce myself. My name is Luna, and I am a cat from kitty heavenz"

"Don't you mean StarClan?" Someone shouted.

"NO! I COME FROM KITTY HEAVENZ!" Luna shouted. "Anyway on with the votes. Here we have the lovely Snowcrystal of ThunderClan who says:' FIRESTAR! FIRESTAR!' Obviously, the voter loves FIrestar and votes for him.

"Yay!" Firestar danced around Tigerstar. "I got this in the bag!"

"DON'T ACT STUPID!" Luna yelled. "Anyway, valyoaks says:' FIRESTAR ALL THE WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY sorry Jacksepticeye moment'. Its okay, we all have them."

"Who's Jacksetipie?" Someone asked.

"OMG! You don't know Jacksepticeye?" Luna yelled. "You haven't lived yet." Throwing a Note seven at the cat, she said, "Here, search him up." Confused, Onestar, who got the phone thrown at him, looked at the phone before it blew up. He squealed like a kit and jump 40 feet into the air before finding out that he is not dead. "Whoops." Luna said. "That was my fault" she then threw a IPhone 4 (because that's what I write my stories on) at him. "Onwards with the votes, MistonDawn says:' Tigerstar so we can see wmore chaos explode in the clannnssss! XD' " Luna paused as Tigerstar gave a speech.

"Thank you for voting! I promise you there will be more chaos, and I just want-"

"Tiggerstar, SHUT UP!" Luna yelled. "YOU ARE MY FAVE CHARACTER ALONG WITH (aka Cloudtail) BUT PLEASE JUST STOP!" He stopped. "Thanks bub. Anyway, a guest says:': Tiger star is the brst ladda!' But, sadly there is no Tiger star, so that doesn't count." Tigerstar had a total break down, and Firestar started to cry of joy. "But I get to vote as well (even though I'm not 18) and I vote Tigerstar!" Now, Firestar had a total break down. "I will announce the tie breaker now. Whoever brings me Cloudtail first wins!" At once, Tigerstar and Firetstar leaped down and ran towards a terrified Cloudtail. Tigerstar pushed Firestar away, grabbed Cloudtail, and ran towards Luna. "Tigerstar wins!" Luna yelled, grabbed Cloudtail, and made a run for it. A triggered Brightheart ran after Luna.


	7. Chapter 7

"Ow! Ow!" Luna cried as Brightheart dragged her back to Fourtrees. "I wasn't doing anything to Cloudtail! And if I was, I was not what you think!"

"Then why does he looked scarred for life?" Brightheart said, looking to Cloudtail who had a terrified expression on his face.

"He was like that when Tigerstar gave him to me!" Luna protested.

Anyway, at this point, I just realized that Princess has not been in the last few chapters, so here she comes now.

"Ahhhhh!" Princess screamed as she fell from the sky. But no one noticed until Firestar said, "Look! It's Leafpool!" Everyone looked up, and Princess fell on top of Crowfeather. He died.

"Nooooooo!" Both Leafpool and Nightcloud yelled as he did.

"Never mind!" Firestar yelled. "It's just the main character who hasn't been in the latest chapters!" Anyway, Leafpool ran over to Crowfeather, got out some cream and that thing in hostital movies, and yelled, "CLEAR!" As she pressed the two thingies against Crowfeather. As she did, Crowfeather yelled, "WTF WAS THAT FOR?" Leafpool cried of joy and hugged him. Nightcloud, pissed, ran over to Crowfeather, pulled Leafpool off of him, and hugged Crowfeather.

"STEP ASIDE LADIES!" A voice boomed, and everyone turned to see Feathertail. She ran over to Crowfeather, karate chopped Nightcloud off of him, and grabbed him, jumped on a horse, and ran into the sunrise with Leafpool and Nightcloud running after them.

"Hey! I have a message from StarClam!" Princess yelled.

"Don't you mean StarClan?" Someone yelled.

"Whatever." Princess said. "The message is, 'Watch out for the fire. He will destroy us all.'" Everyone looked at Firestar.

"Don't look at me like that!" He spat.

"There's more!" Princess yelled. "And Thunderstar wants to meet Bramblestar."

"Who's Thunderstar?" Someone yelled.

"All right, who keeps doing that?" Luna, who was playing tug and pull with Brightheart over Cloudtail, asked. A space cleared around Greystripe. "So you are the one who says that." Greystripe nodded nervously. " Well, then. Time for a punishment." As Greystripe tried to escape, Luna bit his tail to keep him from doing so. She grabbed a phone and a pair of headphones, put them on Greystripe, and played a song.

"NOOOOOO!" Greystripe. "You can't put on Justin Bieber's Baby! And the headphones have good quality!" Greystripe cried.

"Anyway!" Princess yelled, "Who's Bramblestar?" A dark brown tabby walked towards her.

"I'm Bramblestar!" He announced.

"Omg!" Princess cried. "You look like that one!" She yelled, pointing at Tigerstar, who was blowing kisses to the crowd.

"That's cuz I'm his son!" He yelled.

"Anyway, a StarClan taxi should appear any minute now." As she spoke, a taxi came pit of nowhere and landed on Bramblestar.

"NOOOOOOO!" Squirrelflight yelled. "THAT'S MY MATE!" The taxi rolled down a window, revealing Bluestar.

"WHERE'S BRAMBLESTAR?" She yelled.

"YOU SQUISHED HIM!" Squirrelflight yelled, flying over to Bluestar and spray painted her neon pink. "NOW YOU ARE NEONPINKSTAR!" Squirrelflight yelled. NEONPINKSTAR preceded to spray paint Squirrelflight green.

"NOW YOU ARE GREENSQUIRREL! NEONPINKSTAR yelled. Then, the two she-cat fought over the box of spray cans that Alderheart coughed up.

"JAYFEATHER!" He cried. "I COUGHED UP A TWOLEG THINGY! WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?"

"It means" Jayfeather growled, "you should stop eating twoleg stuff."

"OKAY!" He yelled. He preceded to eat the taxi. "WAIT! WAS THAT A TWOLEG THINGY?" Alderheart yelled. Jayfeather face pawed.

"FIRESTAR!" Princess yelled. "How are you and Tiggerstar alive since you both died?" Princess yelled.

"Cuz I'm perfect, like my grandkit, Sparkpelt!" He yelled back.

"What?" Sparkpelt yelled. "I was hunting mice and catching 42 mice per second!" She yelled.

"I'll eat them!" Greystripe yelled. "Just take this song off, Firestar." So, Firestar got shiny boots, put them on, got a hat with a feather and put it on, and got a sword.

"Behold!" He yelled. "I am, FIRESTAR IN BOOTS!" As he yelled this, he threw his sword, piercing the headphones and taking them off of Greystripe.

"Thank you so much!" Greystripe cried. Then, he ate all of the mice. But that doesn't matter. Sparkpelt caught more, despite it being leaf-bare.

"EVERYBODY, SHUT UP AND LISTEN!" Luna cried, getting everyone to shut up. "I have a note from the author." She said. "The author says this: Since I am the author, I get to choose how I want the story to go. I want Firestar to be Firepaw."

"WHAT?" Firepaw yelled.

"I also want Bramblestar to be Bramblekit."

"What?" Bramblekit cried, returning from the dead.

"I also want Spottedleaf to come back from the dead."

"Yay!" Spottedleaf cried. "I get to be with Firestar."

"But since I'm not a FirestarxSpottedleaf shipper, she gets to go to the Dark Forest."

"NO!" Spottedleaf cried as she go dragged by Thristleclaw into the Dark Forest.

"And" Luna continued. " I superglue Firepaw and Cinderpelt together."

"What?" Both Firepaw and Cinderpelt yell as I super glue them together.

"You can't! Fire, er, Firepaw is my mate!" Sandstorm yelled.

"And Sandstorm gets superglued to Dustpelt." Luna said.

"Noooooooo!" Both Sandstorm and Dustpelt yell and I superglue em together.

"Sandstorm turns into Sandpaw and same thing to Dustpelt." Luna said. "Brackenfur turns into Brackenpaw and Greystripe turns into Greypaw. Cloudtail turns into Cloudkit and Swiftpaw survives." As they all transformed, Swiftpaw ran over to Brightheart. "But, I am a CloudxBright shipper, so Swiftpaw goes to hell-I mean, the Dark forest." Swiftpaw screams as the groung opened and ate him. "Tune next time to find out what I do next!" Luna said, as the Clans behind her explode with chaos.


	8. Chapter 8

Luna giggled. The Clans will no doubt go insane like this. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Tigerstar grab a spray can that Alderheart coughed up, who was currently getting lectured by Jayfeather. He sprayed, TiGerStaR WuZ HeRE in bright red letters. Smiling, she pressed her paw onto a green button, making a siren go off.

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP AND LISTEN!" Luna yelled. "NEONPINKSTAR, QUIT THROWING A TANTRUM. NO ONE CARES THAT YOU ARE PINK!" NEONPINKSTAR whimpered and tried to spray paint her self blue again. "GREENSQUIRREL, DON'T LAUGH. YOUR SON JUST COUGHED UP A BOX OF SPRAY PAINT, YOU TERRIBLE MOTHER!" GREENSQUIRREL was also trying to spray paint herself dark ginger again, but was too picky to find the right color. "For crying out loud" Luna mumbled under her breath as she walked over to GREENSQUIRREL and handed her a random color.

"But it's not dark ginger!" She protested.

"No one cares!" Luna told her. "Anyway, I have to-"

"HOLY SMOKES SOMEONE GRAFFITIED THE FOUR OAKS!" Greypaw yelled. Everyone trampled over each other to see the trees.

"Who did it?" Someone asked.

"Why would anyone do that?" Someone else asked.

"It's probably Firestar!" A voice yelled, louder than the others. "Remember, Fire will destroy us all?" Luna looked for the person, and saw Tigerstar. "We must get rid of him!" He yelled, and everyone agreed.

"It's Firepaw." Firepaw fumed, mad that he was stuck to Cinderpelt. "I'm still stuck at Cinderpelt" he yelled.

"Nothing a bit of magic can't fix." Cloudkit said. Everyone looked at him. "The twoleg that stole me gave me magical powers." He shrugged. "I was just so adorable."

"Prove it!" Tigerstar yelled.

"EVERYONE, STAND BACK!" He ordered. Everyone stood back, except for Firepaw and Cinderpelt. "I call to the spirits of onomonotopai to help me unstuck these poor cats!" He said, and karate chopped them apart. "See?" He said, smugly. "I'm more than just some annoying kit."

"A kit that I rightfully stole!" Luna said, and grabbed Cloudkit and ran. "Also, Crookedstar has your leather jackets, NEONPINKSTAR." She said before jumping on a rainbow made of chocolate that was sparkaly. All kits tried to eat it.

"I'm Bluestar again!" Bluestar announced joyfully. Then, a screech made everyone freeze.

"EW MY STARCLAN!" GREENSQUIRREL yelled. "I'M GOLD!" She yelled. She was indeed gold.

"MOM, WHY DID YOU USE MY SPRAY CAN?" Alderheart yelled. "I WAS GOING TO USE THOSE!"

"Why do you have spray cans?" GREEN- screw it. Lets just call her GOLDSQUIRREL now.

"CUZ! I WAS GOING TO SPRAY PAINT TWIGPAW BROWN AND PURPLE AND BLUE AND WHITE AND YELLOW AND JADE AND ORANGE AND VIOLET AND GOLD AND NEON ORANGE AND NEON PURPLE AND SKY BLUE AND RED AND SILVER AND GOLD AND PURPLE!" He said.

"Why would you do such a thing?" GOLDSQUIRREL said.

"Cuz I have to express myself, and what better way to do that then to spray paint my daughter?" He said.

"Do you see me doing that to Sparkpelt when I have to express myself?" She said.

"I bet you think about it." Alderheart said.

"How do you kn-" she cut off as Crookedstar was being tackled by Bluestar.

"Where are my leather jackets?" She yelled.

"I don't know!" He said.

"Those leather jackets were the most important thing to me!" She cried.

"I don't even know what leather jackets are!" He said, crying.

"EVERYONE, FIREPAW IS SPRAY PAINTING THE FOUR OAKS!" Tigerstar yelled, and pointed towards Firepaw, who was duct taped to one of the four oaks.

"I did not!" He yelled. "You duct taped me!"

"Lies!" Tigerstar yelled.

"The writing say, 'Tigerstar waz here!" Firepaw said. "That wasn't me!" He cried.

"How do you know how to read?" Tigerstar yelled.

"How do you know how to write?" Firepaw challenged him.

"I don't!" He said.

"I have a Master's degree in english!" Firepaw said. "I used to be an english teacher!" Firepaw confessed. "But how does Tigerstar know how to write?" He asked.

"I know!" Luna yelled, falling gracefully on Firepaw. And by that I mean falling off of a rainbow and nearly squishing Firepaw. "As a young kit, Tigerstar has excelled where other kit have failed. He quickly learned the alphabet and learned to write in a quarter of a moon. He had hopes of leaving ThunderClan to teach english to cats who did not. He also knows how to speak Spanish, German, French, Portuguese, and many other languages." Luna said. "He also knows Pig Latin."

"Lies!" He spat.

"Then how do you explain this video?" Luna said, and took out a Note 7, which blew up in her face. "Darn technology these days!" She yelled, and took out her back up phone, an IPhone 20c+. "Look!" She yelled, and made the phone big enough for everyone to see.

"Say, Guten Tag." A voice said. The phone showed Tigerstar with earbuds on. He had a samsung.

"Guten Tag." Tigerstar said.

"Now say 'Map!" A second voice said.

"Map!" Tigerstar cried joyfully.

"Now say, uno!" The voice said again.

"Uno!" Tigerstar cried again. The video's angle changed so that the viewer could see him watching Dora.

"Now say, 'No! No quero to cara fea!'" Dora's voice said again.

"NO ONE TELLS TIGERSTAR WHAT TO DO!" Tigerstar yelled, and threw the phone to the wall. "TIGERSTAR IS THE ALMIGHTY!" He yelled again, and the video ended.

"As you can see, Tigerstar learned German from an app and Spanish from Dora the Explorer." Luna said. "Well, until he spazzez out"

"I'm innocent!" He cried.

"If you want a trial, you are going to get one!" Luna cried, and payed five tons of catnip to Alderheart to cough up a mini judge set for cats.

"ORDER IN THE COURT!" She yelled, banging the gravel she had, and the trial began.

Here is the catch. I don't know what should happen next. I will do whatever the reviews say, because I ran out of ideas. GUTEN NACHT! REVIEW! Plz, I beg you.

The chapter was disappointing, wasn't it?


	9. Chapter 9

Lol, no one said anything. My life is sad.

"Okay, Tigerstar, do you have a lawyer?" Luna asked.

"No, but-" Tigerstar said, but was cut off by Luna.

"Excellent. I will give you one." Luna said cheerfully. "SPOTTEDLEAF!" Luna yelled.

"Yes?" Spottedleaf said.

"Who do you think should be Tigerstar's lawyer?" Luna asked.

"I-"

"That's lovely" Luna said. "Leopardfoot, come on down!"

"Nooooo!" Tigerstar cried. "Anyone but her!"

"Fine. Pinestar, come on down!"

"Actually, I'm ok with Leopardfoot!" Tigerstar said fastly.

"Ok." Luna shrugged. "Tigerstar, you have been accused of murder, watching Dora, spazzing out, learning German, and multiple murder attempts. What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Innocent?" Tigerstar said.

"Everyone who was involved in one of his charges, please come up here." Firepaw, Bluestar, Cinderpelt, Redtail, and Scourge came up. "Come on!" Luna said. "Surely more of you supposed to come up?"

"Actually, the author's school only has the first two series!" I yell. "So, I don't have a clue who else comes up here."

"Fine!" Luna yells. "Firepaw, explain why you are here."

"He tried to kill me by drowning me, letting me get hurt by someone, when he tried to kill Bluestar, and when he tried to let the dogs kill me, oh, and he tried to send the dogs on us, so I guess the fifth book cats come up here, and everyone in the sixth book when he tried to get BloodClan fight us." Firepaw replied.

"Sounds pretty guilty to me." Luna said. "GUIL-"

"I haven't presented my case!" Tigerstar whined.

"Do you even have a case?" Luna asked.

"Uhhh… Yes?" Tigerclaw said. Clearing his throat, he said, "I, Ti-"

"GUILTY!" Luna cried like a maniac, and slammed her gravel about a thousand times. "JAIL! PRISON! DEATH SENTENCE!"

"What's wrong with you?" Tigerstar cried.

"I HAD ONE HUNDRED JOLLY RANCHERS!" Luna cried gleefully.

"When?" Tigerstar asked.

"Eleventeen seconds ago!" Luna yelled.

"Case closed!" Leopardfoot yelled. "TIGERSTAR IS INNOCENT!"

"But Luna said that he was guilty!" Firepaw protested.

"Luna's crazy!" Leopardfoot said.

"No denying that!" Bluestar agreed.

"We will finish this another day!" Firepaw said, and the judge set disappeared. That's when the sky cleared and a white cat appeared, and gracefully floated down to the ground.

"Don't mind me folks!" He called. "I'm here to calm Luna down!" As he spoke, he chained Luna up the the Four oaks. "DON'T TRY TO LEAVE OR YOU WILL DIE!" He yelled at her, then floated back up the the sky.

"NOOOOOO! THE TALKING PILE OF SNOW IS LEAVING!" Luna cried, and broke free of the chains and took out a Note 7 and exploded into the sky.

"Well, that happened." Firepaw said. "Who wants Starbucks?" Everyone cheered, and Firepaw got six hundred catnip spice lattes. "Whoops." Firepaw said as everyone preceeded to go crazy.


	10. I JUST REALIZED I COULD NAME CHAPTERS!

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Tigerstar yelled, pointing at Firepaw. "FIREEEE!" Everyone freaked out.

"We're going to die!" Crowfeather yelled.

"We're going to burn alive!" Leafpool yelled.

"We have to evacuate before it spreads!" Bluestar yelled. As she tried to evacuate, she ran into Sparkpelt. "MORE FIRE!" She yelled.

"NOOOOOOOOO, I'M ON FIRE!" Sparkpelt said.

"STOP, DROP, AND ROLL!" Jatfeather yelled.

"OK!" Sparkpelt said, and rolled around in the ground until she rolled all the way to the old forest.

"EVERYONE THE MOVING FIRE IS STILL HERE!" Tigerstar yelled, and everyone freaked out again.

"GET IN WATER!" Tigerstar yelled, and everyone ran and jumped off the island.

"I CAN'T SWIM!" Mothwing cried.

"YOU'RE RIVERCLAN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" Crowfeather yelled.

"Oh yea." Mothwing said and swan to the shore. But not everyone is RiverClan.

"HELLLPPPPPPPPL!" Tigerstar cried. "I'M BURNING!"

"MEEE TOOOO!" Jayfeather yelled.

"YOU IDIOTS!" A voice called, and everyone looked up to see Oakheart with other RiverClan/StarClan cats. "YOU CAN'T JUST DROWN YOURSELFS!" He said, while the other cats saved the drowning ones. "BLUESTAR! You should know better!"

"THERE'S FIRE IN THE ISLAND!" Bluestar said, pointing to Firepaw, who was facepawing on the shore.

"But that's Firepaw." Oakheart said.

"DON'T GIVE THE FIRE A NAME! THAT'S WHAT IT WANTS!" Bluestar cried, slapping Oakheart.

"You, out of all people." Oakheart said. "That's the kit you brought to replace Mistystar and Stonefur to feel better about yourself!"

"Oh yea!" Bluestar said. "FIREPAW, YOU ARE NOW FIREKIT!" Bluestar cried, making Firepaw turn into Rusty.

"NO! As a kit I was Rusty!" Rusty cried.

"FINE! AS LEADER OF THUNDERCLAN, I HERE BY NAME YOU FIREKIT. YOU NOW ARE MY KIT." Bluestar cried, grabbing Firekit and carrying by the scruff to Oakheart. "I CAN BE A QUEEN AGAIN!" Bluestar cried joyfully.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO BLUESTAR DON'T GIVE THE FIRE A NAME! THAT'S WHAT IT WANTS!" Sandstorm yelled.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Bluestar cried, throwing Firekit into the river. "KILL IT WITH FIRE!" She cried.

"SANDSTORM, what the heck?!" Firekit yelled.

"IT TALKS!" Alderheart yelled. "IT'S WITCHCRAFT!"

"BURN THE WITCH!" Everyone cried. They tied up Firekit and ducttapped him to a pole.

"WAIT!" He yelled. Everyone waited. "I just realized that Tigerstar killed Brindleface. She was also supposed to come up in the court!"

"KILL THE WITCHCRAFT!" Leafstar yelled.

"YOU SUPPOSED TO BE IN SKYCLAN!" Firekit yelled.

"SKYCLAN CAN GO TO THE DARK FOREST!" Leafstar cried. "I WANT TO JOIN THIS CLAN!"

"WITCHCRAFT!" Everyone yelled, and lit the pole that Firekit was stuck to on fire.

"KILL CLOUDKIT! HE KNOWS MAGIC!" Firekit yelled.

"NO I DON'T" Cloudkit yelled.

"DON'T KILL ME!" Firekit said, starting to cry. "I'M JUST A HELPLESS KIT!"

"The fire IS kinda cute." Sandstorm said. "I CALL DIBS ON MAKING HIM MY KIT."

"NO, I WANT HIM AS A KIT!" Nightcloud screamed.

"I NEVER HAD A KIT! I WANT A KIT!" Feathertail said.

"NO, I WANT HIM!" Ravenpaw said, coming out of the sky, took Firekit, and ran with all of the she-cat following him, screaming.

"WHY DID THIS HAPPEN!?" Oakheart said, facepawing.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Crowfeather cried. "A TALKING CLOUD!" He said, pointing at Cloudkit.

"WITCHCRAFT!" Stonefur cried.


	11. A NAMED CHAPTER:D

"GOOOOD EVENING EVERYBODY!" Firekit greeted. He was on a stage with the lights off except for a spotlight on him. "Don't struggle and this will be over quicker." Firekit said to Crowfeather as he was teleported to a chair as well with everybody else. "Today, we have something fun!" Firekit said. "We are going to play a game called, "CAT FUED!" He pressed a button, and a rasberry played. "Wrong button!" He said, and pressed another button, which activated elevator music. "Hold on! Don't change fanfiction!" He said and he messed with the button machine. "COME ON!" He yelled after a minute, and threw the machine on the floor. "YOU SHOULD DO AS I SAY!" He cried, and set it on fire. After a quick commercial break, he was back. "We should call our constentants up!" He said as the stage behind him lit up. Just imangine a Family Fued stage, ok?

"FIRST UP, the rules!" Firekit called out. "There will be a question. One cat from each group will come up and answer it before the other one. Each team will have a leader, one medicine cat, one deputy, and three warriors. Ok? Ok!" He said with a smile.

"THAT'S MY KIT UP THERE!" Ravenpaw called from the audience. "I'M SO PROUD OF YOU FIREKIT!"

"Thanks." Firekit said, wincing. "First group, Bluestar, Redtail, Spottedleaf, Sandstorm, Smuge, and Frostfur! That's right, first generation!" He called. "Well, more like The Prophecy Begins arc." The cats he called up were teleported up to the stage.

"WHAT'S GOING- oh, hey Firekit!" Bluestar said. "What's happening?"

"NEXT GROUP!" Firekit called. "Bramblestar, Cinderpelt, Oakheart, Cloudtail, Brightheart, and Dustpelt!" Every cat he called came up. "First contentsants, come up! Category, herbs!" Obiously, Spottedleaf and Cinderpelt came up. "Ok, this is what you do. I ask the question, whoever presses the button first gets to answer. Ready?" They both nod. "What-" Cinderpelt presses the button like a thousand times.

"MARIGOLD WITH JUNIPER BERRIES!" She cried.

"Correct!" Firekit cried. "Correct!"

"That's not fair!" Spottedleaf cried. "You didn't even say the question."

"But she got the answer right." Firekit shrugged. "Next category, ThunderClan history!" Cloudtail and Frostfur came up. "Same rules. Ready?" They both nod. "Which white pelted cat was Firestar's second OFFICIAL apprentice?" Frostfur pressed the button.

"BRACKENFUR!" She cried. "He was your apprentice, right?"

"NO!" Firekit cried. He was interrupted by Cloudtail.

"It was Whitestorm, duh!" He said. Firekit facepawed. "GLORIA, what did you give these cats before the game?"

"Some tea drugged with five pounds of catnip!" Gloria, a beautiful calico assistant answered.

"THAT WAS THE ONE THING I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO!" Firekit yelled.

"BUT THEN IT WOULD BE BORING!" Gloria whined.

"AFTER THIS FANFICTION, YOU'RE FIRED!" Firekit yelled. "Anyway, the answer was Cloudtail. I think. Since Whitestorm was white pelted two, Cloudtail's group gets half a point. The score is 2-0."

"I DEMAND A REFUND!" Frostfur yelled.

"FINE!" Firekit yelled, and threw five mice at her. "BUT YOU DON'T GET THE TAXES BACK!"

"Anyway, on with the show. Category, name that cat." Bramblestar and Smudge came up. "Same thing, ready?" They both nodded. "Which flame colored tom left to be a warrior in ThunderClan after prophetic dreams?"

"I KNOW!" Bramblestar yelled, slamming a stick on the buzzer. "IT WAS TIGERSTAR!"

"WHAT THE HECK WHY-" Firekt took a deep breath. "No, that is wrong."

"WAS IT RUSTY?" Smudge said calmly.

"Correct!" Firekit said, surprised that he actually wasn't crazy.

"Catnip doesn't work on me." Smudge exclaimed. "Also, how am I here if I'm not a warrior?"

"Maybe the author also had catnip." Firekit shrugged. "Next category, Quote that cat!" Sandstorm and Oakheart came up. "Bla bla ready?" Firekit said." They nod. "Here is the quote:'Call out if if you need a hand. If she looks like she's going to have you, I'll sneak up behind her and whack her on the head with a stiff rabbit.'" Firekit sighed. "I miss being an apprentice."

"OH OH OH OH OH OH!" Oakheart yelled as he pressed the buzzer. "Was it Hawkfrost?"

"WHA-WHAT?" Firekit freaked out. "HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET HIM?" He cried. "Also, I should change the rating on this fanfiction." He mentally noted. "WRONG!" Firekit cried, and sent the two cats back. "Next category, ThunderClan history 2" Brightheart and Bluestar came up. "Ba bah, ready?" He said, and they both nodded. "Who was the cat that is in the prochecy, 'Like fire, you will blaze through the forest, but beware: even the most power flames can be destroyed by water?'"

"WAS IT THAT ONE CAT?" Brightheart yelled. "WHAT'S HIS NAME, FIREPELT? FIREMOON? FIREFUR? FIREJAW? OH WAIT, IT'S HAWKFROST!"

"I'M SURROUNDED BY IDIOTS!" Firekit yelled. "I QUIT!"

Firekit raged quit.

"What's his deal?" Bluestar asked Brightheart.

"No idea." Brightheart said.


	12. repel's idea

Luna was pacing around in a lab. There, about twenty cats were hard at work, trying to come up with new ideas for chapters. Suddenly, a brick was tossed into a window, shattering it.

"IT'S SHADOWCLAN!" Someone yelled, and everyone freaked out.

"Calm down!" Luna said. "It's just a brick."

"A BRICK THROWN BY SHADOWCLAN!" Someone else yelled, and everyone started to panic again.

"No, it's just a review!" Luna cried. "Look, there's a note attached to it!" She pointed to the brick, which had a note duct taped on to it. "There's an idea here!" She said.

"Yay, a day off!" Someone else yelled.

"Go drown yourselfs!" Luna cried.

"Yellowfang, come here!" Luna cried.

—-

"Yes?" Yellowfang said. "Did you have to call me up now? I was in the middle of telling Fireheart that I wish he was his mother."

"You can die later. You have a wedding to go to."

"Whose getting married?" Yellowfang asked.

"Firestar and Cinderpelt." Luna said.

"That can't happen!" Yellowfang cried.

"Lucky for you, it's not." Luna said. To a walkie talkie, she said, "I have Yellowfang here. Come measure her for her dress." A heartbeat later, Gloria came in, measured Yellowfang, and left, all in a few seconds.

"Wait, I'M getting married!?" Yellowfang cried. "But I'm super old!"

"Age doesn't matter when it comes to love!" Luna said. "But money does. Are you rich?"

"Yes, but-"

"That's probably why." Luna said. Then, Gloria came with a beautiful white dress and a bouquet of yellow, purple, and white flowers. "Look, it's made of the best silk and velvet there is!" Luna cried.

"I'm not wearing that!" Yellowfang cried.

"My fanfiction, my decisions!" Luna said, and forced the dress on Yellowfang, which caused her to lose a claw and a lot of fur.

"You look beautiful!" Luna cried.

"I look hideous!" Yellowfang cried.

"I know right!" Luna cried. Then, a honk was honked. "Oh, look! Your limo is here!" Luna said, pointing to a window where a forty feet long limo was parked. She tied up Yellowfang to a wagon, and put the wagon in the limo.

"To the ocean!" Luna cried, and the limo started to drive.

Five hours later.

"We are here!" Luna cried as she tipped the driver some diamonds. Before her, an arc of yellow roses and lilies was woven to balloons. About fifteen chairs were placed on each side. One side said Yellowfang and the other side said repel. Fireheart, Brokentail, a mad Raggedstar, Cinderpelt, Rowanberry, Sedgewhisker, Scorchwind, and Nutwhisker were on the side of Yellowfang. No one was on the side of repel.

Then, a tabby came out and sat down on the alter.

"Who's that?" Yellowfang asked, pointing at the tabby.

"That's your future husband!" Luna cried, and plopped her next to repel on the alter.

"Say your I do's and get it over with." Bluestar, the preacher, said.

"I do!" repel said.

"I'M NOT GOING TO SAY THAT-" Yelloefang was cut off by a recording of her saying I do.

"You're now married." Bluestar said, and drives away on her 2017 camero.

repel took Yellowfang and drove off to the sunrise.


	13. thought you've seen the last of me?

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP AND LISTEN!" Tigerstar yelled as he climbed up on the tree that leaders climb. "I have an idea to-CROWFEATHER I SWEAR IF YOU KEEP ON-DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT, ALDERHEART! CROWFEATHER, STOP. EATING. CATMINT!" He yelled angerly.

"But it's goood." Crowfeather whined.

"DOES IT LOOK LIKE IF I CARE? Now, back to my idea, if we-CROWFEATHER, LAST WARNING!"

"Nuh-uh!" Crowfeather said as he continued to shove catmint into his mouth. "I LOVE IT MORE THAN I EVER LOVED ANYTHING! INCLUDING LEAFPOOL!"

"OH NOOO YOU DIDN'TTT!" Leafpool screeched. "WE HAD KITS TOGETHER, AND YOU LOVE CATMINT MORE?!"

"YESSSSSS!" Crowfeather yelled.

"ARGH!" Leafpool yelled, and lunged at the catmint. "THIS IS FOR TAKING MY CROWFEATHER AWAY!" She yelled as she shredded the catmint.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Crowfeather yelled. "THAT WAS MY LIFE SAVINGS WORTH OF CATMINT!"

"Dude, that was only like, three dollars worth of catmint. How broke are you?" Leafpool said.

"It's very hard to make money these days!" Crowfeather said. But he was interrupted by Hollyleaf.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO! THE CATMINT! SAVE THE CATMINT!" She yelled, giving cpr to the catmint. "LIVE!" She yelled as she pressed her paws against the catmint, trying to get it to breath.

"HOLLYLEAF! IT'S USELESS! YOU HAVE TO TAPE IT TOGETHER!" Bramblestar yelled.

"OKAY!" She yelled, and duct taped the catmint together. "YESSSSSSS IT LIVESSSS!" She exclaimed.

"OMG HOLLYLEAF BROUGHT CATMINT BACK FROM STARCLAN!" Alderheart yelled. "SHE'S A HERO!"

"HOLLYLEAF!" Everyone chanted. "HOLLYLEAF!"

"That made zero sense." Tigerstar said.

"You're just jealous that I have the IPhone 7!" Hollyleaf said, sticking her tounge out at Tigerstar. She holded up the phone. "And it has a glittery case!"

"THAT WAS MY GLITTERY CASE!" Alderheart hissed. "I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET IT FROM SANTA CLAWS!"

"ALDERHEART, WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT OPENING YOUR PRESENTS?" Squirrelflight, who was still gold, scolded.

"You said, 'It's a wonder why I still have money after buying you all that shampoo!'" Alderheart quoted with a grin on his face. "And my shampoo is a very good brand."

"I know. I use it." Squirrelflight purred. "BUT THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT!" Then, Cloudtail came and holded up a red bag.

"I FOUND A FAT CAT WITH A BAG SO I STOLE IT AND NOW HE SAYS THAT I'M ON THE NAUGHTY LIST BUT I DON'T CARE BECAUSE I CAN HACK HIS COMPUTER AND CHANGE THE LIST BECAUSE I CAN HACK ANYTHING EVEN THE WHITEHOUSE!" Cloudtail exclaimed.

"OH MY STARCLAN, WHY DID YOU STEAL SANTA CLAW'S BAG?!" Bramblestar yelled/asked.

"Wait, he's real?" Cloudtail asked, tipping his head to a side. "I thought a crazy twoleg made him up."

"The author sure is a crazy twoleg." Bramblestar mumbled under his breath. "Moving on-"

"Wait, Santa Claws isn't real?" Tigerstar whimpered.

"Yes, a magical cat that can deliver presents in one night to a whole world of cats is obviously very real." Bramblestar mewed sarcastically.

"Awesome!" Tigerstar purred. Bramblestar face pawed. Multiple times.

"NO, SANTA CLAWS ISN'T REAL!" Bramblestar yelled. Several kits and Tigerstar started to cry.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING NOT REAL?" A fat white cat with a beard floated from the sky. His pelt had dark ginger on it, so it looked like a coat. "I AM SANTA CLAWS!"

"Oh, look, it's the cat who I stole the bag from!" Cloudtail purred. "HIIIII!" He waved at Santa Claws.

"OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!" Santa Claws grabbed a flamethrower and aimed it at Cloudtail. Cloudtail grabbed a chainsaw and aimed it at Santa Claws.

"DON'T MOVE UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE CHAINSAWED!" Cloudtail screeched.

"YOU DON'T MOVE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE ROASTED LIKE A MARSHMALLOW!" Santa Claws screeched back. Longtail burst out laughing.

"It's because he looks like a real live marshmallow!" Longtail laughed. Tigerstar sent him a look.

"How do you know what a marshmallow looks like?" He asked, tipping his head to a side.

"Why did you cry when Bramblestar said that Santa Claws wasn't real?" Longtail challenged him. Tigerstar shrugged. At the mention of Bramblestar, a bag of potato chips gets thrown at him.

"Uh, okay." Bramblestar said, looking at the bag. "But why waffle flavored?"

"Because I feel like it!" I yell at him.

"You have a poor choice in potato chips!" Bramblestar yelled back at me.

"I'LL LET YOU KNOW THAT I AM THE AUTHOR!" I yell at him, and throw more potato chip bags at him. "I CAN MAKE YOU HOT PINK RIGHT NOW IF I WANTED TO!"

"OH HECK NO!" Bramblestar cried and hid behind Squirrelflight.

"That's what I thought." I say. Now back to the story.

"YOU MOVED!" Cloudtail screeched, and chainsawed Santa Claws' beard off.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Santa Claws cried. "YOU'RE ON THE NAUGHTY LIST FOR LIFE!"

"I DON'T CARE! I CAN HACK ONTO ANYTHING!" Cloudtail screeched. "I HACKED THE PRESIDENT YESTERDAY!"

"Which one?" Bramblestar asked. He gets another bag of potato chips thrown at him. "Why? Why hot dog flavor?" He picks up the bag. "It seems-" he broke off as the bag explodes.

"MOMMYYYYYYYYYYY!" Bramblestar cried. He started to cry and hung on to Squirrelflight like if his life depended on it. "THE BAG EXPLODED!"

"I can see that." She growled through gritted teeth. She pat him on the head to calm him down.

"The one that rules what ever country we live in!" Cloudtail answered.

"There is no president in the UK. Only the prime minister." Leafpool said, wearing cute nerd glasses with scotch tape in the middle.

"Fine. The president of another country."

"America it is!" Leafpool chirped. "Do you mean the elected one, or the one that is still the one right now?"

"The orange one." Cloudtail answered, getting annoyed.

"Oh, you're the hacker that goes by OFHDIDB1294749?" Leafpool asked. "You're pretty wanted right now. They say as soon as they find you you'll go to prison!" Leafpool adjusted her glasses. "Or are you THEFLUFFYWHITEWARRIORKANYE4PRESIDENT2020? That hacker gets an even worse punishment!" Leafpool giggled. "He/she gets to sent to a country called PAPAYA that is very hard when it comes to punishments."

"Both, actually." Cloudtail says.

"'Kay!" Leafpool chirps. Then she takes out a walkie talkie and says, "I have THEFLUFFYWHITEWARRIORKANYE4PRESIDENT2020 and OFHDIDB1294749. Turns put there the same person." Theres a pause. "NO, I DON'T CARE!" Another pause. "JUST SEND THE POLICES!" Another pause. Whatever the other person said must've angered her, because she threw the walkie talkie to the floor and yelled, "I HAVE HAD IT WITH THE STUPID FBI!" Then, a car came out of nowhere and scared the living daylights out of everyone.

"IT'S ABOUT TIME!" Leafpool exclaimed. People came out of the car and jumped on Cloudtail and announced that he's going to jail.

"But I'm just a fluffy cat!" Cloudtail protested. He made his blue eyes big and sad and the FBI fell in love with the fluffy tom. They got off of him and petted him.

Then Cloudtail went all kung fu on them and beat the stuffing out of everyone.

"WHAT THE FLIPPING BANANA?" One of the FBI guys said.

"Hahahahahaha." Cloudtail laughed, and pulled out his chainsaw. "I AM THE KING OF THE WORLDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!" He chainsawed the FBI guys hair off. Then he pulled out Santa Claws' flamethrower.

"Hey!" Santa Claws yelled as he couldn't find his flamethrower. Before Cloudtail could flamethrower people, Graystripe got a crazy look in his eyes and flew to Cloudtail using his hawk instincts and took the flamethower.

"YAYYYYYYY!" Graystripe yelled and hugged the Flamethrower and set the forest on fire.

And that's how the fire in Rising Storm was caused.

Moral of the story: potato chips explode


End file.
